Agua Dulce Gloriosa (they/them), 35
Miami, Florida

Where are your ancestors from?

My mom is from Colombia, a mix of native Pijao and Guatavita peoples and an Arab lineage originating from Palestine and Lebanon. On my dad's side, I am Cuban, but his grandparents (my great-grandparents) were from Spain. 

What is your religion, practice, spirituality, or faith?

I don't identify with a specific, named way of practice. I think of my practice as an amalgamation of the different cultures and belief systems that have shaped my identity, understanding, and connection to spirit / ancestors / the earth / the divine. This includes elements of Lucumi, Taoism, earth worship, ancestor veneration, self-as-godliness practices, and even quantum physics: the same materials and matter that I am made up of are the same thing that everything else is made up of.. there's no distinguishing me from a godly creator, source, spiritual figures, or even the earth. So, it truly is an intertwined practice.

How would you describe your practice? 

My practice has been built on going deeper within and really trying to listen to what feels good, what feels right - trusting myself, and allowing myself to possess the power of harmony and intuitive knowing. Upon reflecting, I’d say this stems from having been told that I had such little power growing up, that instead this Christian/Catholic white male colonial God is the one who possessed all power and knowing. My spiritual practice has been a process of listening to and trusting the ancestors that speak through me. It's difficult to lean on any specific tradition when you come from so many places and people that you’re no longer connected to. Though I lean on them and am informed by them, at the end of the day, many of my ancestral cultural and spiritual beliefs have been shaped by colonization, or lost via assimilation, or destroyed through ethno-and-genocide, or sacrificed to become whatever it needed to be, to do, to survive. At the end of the day, the differing cultural and spiritual practices that exist within me are interwoven and braided so intricately into each other that there's no one way to be/practice. This is why I return to the earth. This land has been here since before we ever existed and it'll continue on after us. It is the land that my ancestors lived and died on, that they worshiped and prayed on. That they laughed, and danced, and cried on. This land is made of the blood and bones of my lineage of people. And to be clear, I don’t mean this land as in this country or continent, I mean this land as in the ground and water and rocks and plants that make up the earth - it is all divinely interconnected. 

WHAT IS YOUR FIRST MEMORY OF SPIRITUALITY?

Mmm. I have unfortunately blocked out a lot of my upbringing, but I do know that I was raised Catholic. My dad was a Santero, so he had his own spiritual and ritualistic practices, however my mom made sure to keep that away from us growing up. I would think that the first memories I would have would be the Catholic church, confessions, the bible, wine, communion, the little crackers that they give you at service, things like that. But beyond that, there’s images of people sitting around, listening to people talk (called homilies, apparently), and not being interested in what they'd have to say. As much as I’d try to listen, my attention span was not built for being talked at/to, so when we’d join my mom at church we’d have to sit outside where I would be able to read, or play, or run around in the grass because I would not be able to sit still inside. I also have early memories of singing in the church choir. But other than that, my memories of the Catholic faith were cut short due to my being banned from church - but that’s a whole other story.

Did anyone introduce you to spiritual practices?  

Not specifically. It was something that happened organically. I didn't realize that I was building altars in a lot of my early performance or installation work until I looked back and was like, “This is an altar!” So, there was not a specific person or space that I can say taught me. But I feel like as somebody who is deeply connected to the people around me, influential and inspirational conversations have been feeding me for some time. I feel like everyone who's been a meaningful part of my life has been able to inform my practice in one way or another. And just to root it in what I’m mostly inspired by, the earth - her waters, her landscapes, her inhabitants, her vistas and views - these have always existed as the grounding and framework for how I connect everything to destiny and the divine. 

How would you define ancestor veneration?

Veneration is a practice of honoring, of showing care, love, and respect for those who came before you. In terms of close relatives who have passed, I am only in veneration relationship with my father. I wasn't close to my grandparents or uncles who have passed, so as far as direct ancestral folks, at this time I’m just centering my dad. I have a pretty large altar to him in my home. I have my favorite shirt and pants that he would wear, and my favorite shoes that he would wear displayed on the altar. I also have his Bible on there, which was really important to him as he had read from it to his brother when he was passing away from cancer. He carried red ribbons around (as his spiritual advisors told him to) so I have the ones that were in his car on the altar. I have displayed the knife that he used to keep with him in addition to a coconut shell he’d keep by his bedside. There’s just a lot of different elements of him incorporated: his car keys, the necklace and ring he’d never take off, the perfume that he’d wear, his CD’s and cooking books from Cuba, the box that held his cremated remains and more. I also, of course, have offerings for him. Things he enjoyed in his life, like Turrón, white Zinfandel wine, Jose Cuervo tequila, etc. And as always with my altars, there’s a small glass of water, selenite lamps, incense, and candles (when I’m around enough to monitor them). He was an avid Cuban coffee drinker, so I’d like to incorporate more coffee as an offering to him. As a Piscean Caribbean man with a connection to Yemaya, there’s a lot of blue elements that surround and ground the altar, just to bring ocean energy into the space of memory, venerance, and love.

Do you have any gifts that you think divinely came from God to you?

Yes, many, though they may seem understated. My ability to connect people and needs to each other - being able to see the web of connections that exist, and how to strengthen its threads. I’m also able to hold a lot of space and capacity for other’s grief. I carry an air of safety that encourages folks to unmask, to get real and deepen into sharing things that are difficult, things that our society doesn't normally make space for. So, whether that is through tattooing, or through sound baths, or energy / somatic practices, or through the altar spaces I create, or just conversations I carry, I know this to be a huge gift I am able to offer to others. I also have the gift of intuition, knowing, and sight - being able to see things, see truths, know truths. I feel like a lot of us have this gift but maybe haven't tapped into it fully yet. My pattern recognition and my connection to nature is also a gift. There’s an ongoing conversation that flows between us in which care, love, knowledge, and understanding is shared. And lastly, I’d say my words are a gift and power I am blessed with. When I speak, people listen and people feel and people feel inspired and people cry. I have found that through my poetry or speeches, or through simple conversation, I am able to inspire folks to connect deeper with their humanity, and to help them see the steps to returning to a more holistic existence, and to believe it is not only possible but that their existence is integral in creating this new world.

What makes you feel closer to God?  

Being in the sun and letting it warm me. Being in the ocean. Being near mountains and by waterfalls, and by trees, and being surrounded by anything that makes me feel both small & in awe, and deeply connected to everything that surrounds me. Deep friendships, feeling loved, giving love, being seen, deep belly laughter, and being so present that I am able to appreciate and treasure these connections in real time. Dancing helps me feel closer and connected to God. Building altars helps me feel more connected to God. Prayer, candle work, and mirror work all help me feel closer to God. When I cook for myself - when I put the time and love in - that helps me feel closer to God. Looking into my mother’s eyes makes me feel close to God. Friends sharing meals with me helps me feel closer to God. Certain songs, music, film - great art brings me closer to God. Gaining knowledge; when a truth is un/discovered, it feels like the spark of life is in me. That helps me feel closer to God. And singing, whether it is silly, funny, joyful songs, or songs that allow for deep reflection and crying, it all helps me feel closer to God. But again, because of how my belief systems and spiritual practices are shaped, I am God. So anything that brings me back to myself, this is an act of worship and something that connects me to godliness/god.